moved by: Mornings

I couldn’t start this blog last night. I had the energy, and Matt was doing his thing downstairs, but I just couldn’t do it. The bed and my book was calling my name too loudly; my evening happy place. I have words from the audiobook I’m currently immersed in (I typically have a reading book and listening book going at the same time, very different so I don’t get confused), “We Need Your Art,” in my head: Honor your own rhythms and pace.

Well, my rhythm past 5pm is the last 4 seconds of the song as it trails out that is actually…silence. In the morning it’s more like a crescendo of energy and hope that maybe today I’ll actually get 1/3rd of the shit done that I want to.

A soundtrack that I can be productive to, that playing as I finally type my first MOVED blog post, is the bird choir out my window. The silence of the other three humans that live in this house, still asleep, only broken by my softly played Jimmy Eat World “Futures” album. By nothing short of a miracle, I’ve been able to, so far this morning, do a little bit of yoga outside, make coffee, DRINK a cup of coffee, write a poem that I’ve proud of, free write to clear my brain a little, and spend too much money on this website soft launch.

This early productivity makes me feel like I have more control over my day. It lifts my spirits. I smile now, as I hear the little one wake up and start to sing his little morning song.

I honor my natural tendency to not do shit at night besides clean up toys, the kitchen, take my makeup off, do some pushups, and cozy up in bed with my sacred book (wait, that’s not actually nothing.)

But it’s all I have the capacity for. And that’s okay. Because I’ll wake up and have a fresh new day to move and create in.

“Don’t it feel like sunshine after all?” -Jimmy Eat World